Emergency Binder for Aging Parents: What To Ask and Write Down
Adult children often discover what they don't know about their parents' affairs in an emergency room or the week after a funeral. A calm conversation now, and a binder filled in together, can change that.
How to start the conversation
- Make it about you. "I'm doing my own binder and it made me realize I wouldn't know where anything of yours is."
- Pick a calm moment, not a holiday dinner or a hospital visit.
- Be clear you aren't asking for money details. You're asking where things are.
- Do it in sessions. One topic per visit is fine.
What to ask and write down
Health
- Doctors, pharmacy, medications, allergies
- Do they have an advance directive and a health care power of attorney? Where?
Legal
- Is there a will? Who is the executor? Who is the attorney?
- Is there a financial power of attorney?
Money (no numbers, just where)
- Which banks, which retirement accounts, which insurance companies
- Which bills autopay, and from where
- Is anyone already helping with bills?
Home
- Spare keys, alarm, water shut-off, who the trusted handyman is
Digital
- Who knows the phone and computer passwords? Is there a password plan?
Wishes
- What matters most to them if their health declines?
- Burial or cremation? Any pre-paid plan?
Practical tips
- Leave the binder with them and keep a copy of the contacts and documents pages yourself.
- Don't write full account numbers, SSNs or passwords.
- Bring it to appointments if you're becoming their caregiver. A caregiver binder covers medications and appointments in more depth.
The Just-In-Case Life Binder works well as a "fill it in together" workbook, and the Family Caregiver Binder covers the medical side.
Just-In-Case Life Binder — $17
19-page printable binder for everything your family would need to know, plus letter of instruction templates and a life inventory spreadsheet. Instant download: PDF + DOCX + XLSX.
Get the Just-In-Case Life BinderAll 10 kits — $59More guides
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